Reply to How can you cheat and not think about how it will affect your kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]^ and also how did your relationship with him change?[/quote]

I'm not sure if I'm the PP that you're referencing (my dad died) - but before he did, and after a divorce, I just...didn't trust him with my thoughts and feelings. No he didn't marry AP, he had a string of gfs and was full on midlife crisis for a while there.

Our conversations were stilted. Surface topics. I basically looked at him sideways all the time - even if just in my own mind. He tried to be the "cool" dad and all I wanted was the sincere dad. I wanted to know that I could trust him - and I lost that. Our relationship went from me thinking he literally could do no wrong to wondering if he ever really wanted me (at the time). I've since moved past those feelings and grew up but it leaves a scar on your heart if that makes sense. It clouds your relationships that you enter in as an adult - at least it did for me.

I miss him but I don't think of him in the way I think someone would had the events not occurred - it's more a "I wish a had a father that was alive" instead of I wish I had my specific dad. Sounds harsh I know - but this is a fairly anonymous forum so trying to be as honest as possible.[/quote]

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