Reply to Do Women Really Not Want to Work?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think this is an issue you're having with your wife. Every woman is different. I personally would never want to not work and leave my spouse to earn all the money. I actually feel a little sorry for my friends who stay home with their kids, their lives seem really pathetic. They are always complaining about needing a break and how their husbands never do anything around the house etc etc. [/quote]

You sound like a great friend. [/quote]

I mean, I guess at this point calling these women friends is false, I have definitely distanced myself from them since we've all had kids. I have nothing in common with women who stay at home all day and complain that they no longer have time to go to the spa and about how difficult their kids are and how they're soooo tired. [/quote]

I’m sure they’re glad to be rid of you. Do you have the same contempt for your nanny or daycare provider? After all, they just sit around all day. [/quote]

Actually, I don't have a nanny OR a daycare provider. Our work schedules allow for us to do the childcare ourselves. Best of both worlds, for sure. We split things pretty much down the middle-each of us does the same amount of childcare, we both pitch in around the house. It's nice to be in an egalitarian relationship, and you'll never catch either of us complaining how we need a break to go to the spa or that we are sick of our kid.

I have nothing against stay at home moms, I guess, but all the ones I know are miserable complainers who don't seem to enjoy their children at all. My mom was a stay at home mom and I don't remember her acting like stay at home moms do these days, and the way she talks about those years now that I'm an adult and a mom is nothing like the way the stay at home moms I know talk about staying home.[/quote]

Sounds like you need new friends. And to stop generalizing based on a few miserable people.

You need to realize that your situation is unattainable by a vast majority of families. Most people do not have the extreme flexibility that you describe in order to have no child care and  completely balanced caretakung/housekeeping duties. For many people, the reality is that the bulk of child rearing falls on one parent due to career demands, whether that parent works out of the home or not. And that is exhausting. Don’t judge people for venting or claim they don’t enjoy their kids. If you say parenting is all roses and never frustrating, difficult, annoying, etc, you are a liar. [/quote]

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