Reply to Feminism, femininity, and marriage

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"Head of household" PP. Can you give an example of a big decision where your husband's preference trumps your preference?

Sorry if this has been asked in the last 2 pages of sniping, which I did not read because the first 14 pages were pretty exhausting.[/quote]

I've got work to do. I'm no longer wasting my time on people unable comprehend beyond their own ridged bias and ignorance.[/quote]

I was actually curious. It wasn't a loaded question and I'm not the PP who is attacking you. I can think of a number of really big family decisions where there would be no way I could accept someone else's decision if I completely disagreed. My list of dealbreakers is pretty tiny, but because this isn't the way it works in my family, it's pretty much hypothetical. I was hoping that someone for whom it's NOT hypothetical could weigh in about their actual experience.

If it's something like "I preferred school X for Larla while DH preferred school Y and because he's the decider, Larla goes to school Y" that's one thing. There is a thread on Expectant Moms right now where a woman is unexpectedly pregnant after infertility and wants to keep the baby, while her husband wants her to get an abortion. I am curious as to how the "head of household" PP(s) would resolve such a dilemma.[/quote]

I was curious too. But people seem too bitter to answer.[/quote]

I'm a feminist who is disgusted by possibly one or two rabidly upset posters who claim to be "feminists". I can now see why feminists get a bad name. I actually don't see the bitterness coming from the HoH posters. They actually seem quite comfortable with their lives and don't seem to care much about the "feminists" on here and whatever agenda they are trying to push.  With each post, the "feminists" sound more and more unhinged and I'm trying to figure out what is so upsetting to them. The angry hostility is perplexing.[/quote]

I don't like any general rule that men are the heads of households. My husband is definitely the follower in our marriage, in every way. I don't want to be made to feel unfeminine because I have strong leadership qualities and don't want a man telling me where to live or making any other major decisions for me.[/quote]

So that's your personal decision, which I support. Why do you have to agree with other women's decisions to support them? How can you call yourself a feminist if you don't support all women's decisions, even those you disagree with?[/quote]

I do support the woman who posted the house example. Her marriage, her choices.  Just don't call other women who prefer a different marital dynamic "unfeminine."[/quote]

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