Reply to Is it normal for sibling not to tell you they are having a baby?

Forum Index » Family Relationships

Reply to "Is it normal for sibling not to tell you they are having a baby?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Come on, people. Anyone who says they would have responded gracefully to a sibling announcing their child’s birth with no prior notice, on a group text to boot, is just trying to needle the OP. Of course both the timing and method are unusual ways to have announced news of this magnitude to one’s sibling.

That said, OP, this is now your new niece or nephew. Be glad for the family, properly fawn over the new little one, and once the dust settles I’d have a one to one chat with my sibling explaining that you were hurt to have learned of the news this way, I’d emphasize their importance to me, and then I’d move on. [/quote]

Of course it's possible to respond gracefully to the initial announcement. Afterward, how you respond to the prior notice issue depends on the circumstances, which of course will take time to unpack. Just because you cannot fathom a graceful response in this situation does not mean everyone else is bound to your mindset.[/quote]

If I announced news of my new baby in a text (without any prior notice of a pregnancy or surrogacy or desire to adopt), I think every human in my life - sibling, parent, BFF - would respond with, “whachutalkinboutwillis.”[/quote]

What about after learning the news was real. Would you expect every human in your life to assume malice on your part, prior to them making an attempt to understand your decisions?  [/quote]

DP.  In my family I would expect a lot of confusion, questions, and hurt feelings.  Keeping something like this a secret from my parents and siblings (whom I'm in regular contact with) until the birth would be 100% more work than telling them at some point during the pregancy and asking for privacy.  [/quote]

We don’t know that this was kept a secret from anyone other than OP. Keeping news from someone you don’t see for a year — and who clearly dislikes you and thinks badly of you— wouldn’t actually be very difricult.[/quote]

I mean it goes both ways, right?  If the sibling only kept this from the OP, then that is even weirder and has nothing to do with previous losses that many on here have been speculating.  Sibling clearly don't like OP, doesn't visit, and thinks badly of them, otherwise why play this weird game.  Maybe their dislike of OP is justified, maybe not, I don't think any of us has the info to really know.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics