Reply to About to Jump Off a Ledge Over Upcoming MIL Visit, Please Talk Me Down

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[quote=Anonymous]OP you wrote:

[i]But in a way, that means she wins, since getting rid of me has been her goal for 25 years now. When I was younger and had small children, I could be sure that if it came down to a choice then DH would choose me, but that's not a given these days. And [b]I don't want to divorce for financial reasons[/b] and also because we have a tween who would be devastated. And other than this, DH and I get along pretty well.
[/i]

OP is it a given that you and your DH love each other?

Maybe love has nothing to do with marriages from your MIL's culture.

What would happen if your MIL ends up actually living with your family here in the States full time? What would you do then?

Do your children love her and do they enjoy being around her?

My great grandparents lived downstairs from my grandparents. My other set of great grandparents lived next door.

My mother and her mother may have had their differences. And my mother's brother's wife may also have laughed at some of the things my grandmother did.

However, there wasn't a deep seated contempt for one another.

We recognize we're from different generations and different cultures and the "old country."

And as kids, we loved our great grandparents and grand parents. Can you focus on that? It sounds like you have it made because she's doing so much around the house for you. And yet, you don't see it that way. [/quote]

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