Reply to Why so much disgust felt towards men for dating significantly younger?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m a woman dating someone 16 years older. Won’t lie there are issues. Erectile issues and also his ass is a deflated balloon. He is almost entirely bald. He is otherwise fit and handsome and loves sex but these things do matter and he has to make up for it a lot in personality, intelligence, kindness and relationship skills to make it worth thinking about long term. He’s healthy and vigorous now but I know that could change at any time—he’s already on a bunch of medication. I am very fond of him but really need to think of myself first bc obviously there is little downside here for him and a lot of future downside for me, esp considering his money will I assume go to his kids (which I support).[/quote]

Setting aside everything else in this thread, so you see yourself staying with him long term?  I remember a few years ago when DH and I met with our financial planner to go over retirement planning (in our early 40s at the time), and looking at the statistics on when during retirement people tend to be most active, spending money on travel, hobbies, etc., when they tend to slow down (and spend less) and then when you start to see funds consumed by more intensive medical care (nursing home, etc.).  It struck me at the time that if I had married someone 10 years older, and especially 15+ years older), my prime retirement fun years would likely be spent as my spouses caretaker, or at the very least with someone who no longer had the energy to keep up with what I wanted to do.

I realize that shift happens and one of us could spend all their early retirement years caring for the other anyway so marrying someone the same age as you is no guarantee, but I couldn’t see setting myself up for that as a virtual certainty.  [/quote]

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