Reply to Leaving Husband With Baby For A Week

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There are single dads from birth in. There are gay men who adopt babies. Many people have their babies in daycare by 23 weeks and away from mom.

There is no reason why men and in this case op’s husband can’t parent their children. Surprised so many are against fathers as equal parents.

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In my case, it’s not about mothers vs. fathers. I would not have been OK with DH leaving me alone for a week with the baby. I wouldn’t have been able to handle it. And no way in hell would I have tolerated it for something like this.

That being said, OP knows her family best and says it will be fine. Not everyone is the same.

The list of things for me that would cause me to be away from an 8 week old infant would be very short and wouldn’t include helping my dad when there are so many other options. It would be more like:

1. My other child is inpatient at the hospital;
2. Im inpatient at the hospital;
3. My dad is critically ill and literally needs someone to be at the hospital with him for life or death kinds of decision making. Even then, probably wouldn’t leave for a full week. I’d go for a day or two until someone else could step up.

I think it’s hard for some (including me) to relate to OP making such a different decision than we would and for her to be so confident about it.

I keep reminding myself everyone has different needs, priorities, values, skills, etc.

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You’re so weird. Yes it sucks but this is family who really has no other option. I would like for my child (not OP) to have a good relationship with his grandfather and so I would like to be there for him. I survived a week on my own at 6 weeks when my husband had to travel for work - it sucked but you can’t in most jobs tell them no. He only gets like two weeks of pat leave total. I would have been much less annoyed about it if he was going to help his mom who had no other real options. You’re cruel! [/quote]

Op has many other options. She can hire someone else. Her siblings could go. This isn’t the kind of life or death emergency where op is the only person who can help.

It doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with her deciding that given the options, the one that makes the most sense for her is to go. But it’s a choice. Her choice. And different from what I would choose, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong.

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