Reply to Long term affair... trying to wrap my head around if it’s even possible to get over your DH’s 3 yr

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Reply to "Long term affair... trying to wrap my head around if it’s even possible to get over your DH’s 3 yr "

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think they need to do it for the first few years- minimum.  That’s how long experts say recovery takes.  Eventually it needs to move to an egalitarian relationship and can’t be held over spouse’s head forever.

I do know some relationships that came out stronger and the remorse and love betrayer has turns into dedicating rest of life to treating spouse right and making them happy.  Communication and intimacy happens, thankfulness for giving them a chance.  Continued therapy for life, check ins recommended.  The ones that do this make it.  If it was an exit affair or they only stayed because AP ditched them- you don’t want that.  [/quote]

I posted several pages back about my friend who chose to stay with his wife after he busted her and her AP dumped her. I told him he was an idiot for staying, but that if he chose to do that then he had better be ready to forgive her and move on from it. No relationship can survive if one side is constantly in debt to the other.[/quote]

Agree.  But, with the exception of the first two years post-discovery.  Every infidelity expert agrees on that.  There needs to be real concerted effort by the betrayer those first two years post-affair.[/quote]

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