Reply to MIL mad that we want to host Thanksgiving

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Everyone keeps saying this happens every year (even OP says that later on) but that's wrong.  OP clearly says they switch off years, so OP, it's not 7 years that this has been going on - it's been 3 (this is the 4th year, I'm assuming).  And, by you arguing that this happens EVERY YEAR, yet you don't go every other year, are you being the one that finally stands up to MIL on behalf of everyone else?

Oh, and how will your schedule work when it's your turn to host MIL, but your Aunt's turn to host on your side of the family, and it's your family's turn?  you can't host and bring both sides together because you'd be taking away from your Aunt's hosting turn.  And if you don't host when it's your turn, all your plans kind of lose meaning because you clearly don't care enough to skip your side's turn, right? [/quote]

I really don't see how you're not getting this, but let me break it down for you. There are four major holidays a year; half of those are with OP's family, half with DH's family. So, for the sake of all this making sense, let's pretend that every year it's Thanksgiving and Easter with DH's family.

In seven years of marriage--14 possible holidays--MIL has only allowed anyone other than MIL herself to host one holiday: an Easter at OP's house because OP had a pregnancy issue. One out of 14 hosting opportunities went to DH/OP, thirteen hosting opportunities went to MIL.

And apparently, OP/DH and BIL/DIL have made it clear that they actively want to host more holidays, for numerous reasons: traveling with kids, more room for travelers, various work and sports schedules, wanting to make special memories in their own homes, and wanting to cook/use their nice holiday stuff. And apparently, MIL has ignored these requests and has held her ground and yes, a monopoly on holiday hosting.

And yes, even though OP/DH do get to occasionaly host the other side of the family, they should get to make holiday memories in their home with DH's family, too, if that's something the majority of the family is interested in, which clearly is the case.

So, yeah. It's time to share hosting privledges with people who want to host! It's not just about MIL and what MIL wants and what has been done up until now. The times, they are a-changin'. And I personally don't think there is anything wrong with that.[/quote]

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