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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This hasn’t bothered me in a while. I was glad my kids all have a lot of friends. I just feel like some people are just takers. They never offer anything, just take take take.

I know some people have difficult circumstances. I don’t necessarily think it has to do with money but personality.

I wonder if it is lack of basic manners? There are some kids I have hosted, driven, fed countless times with absolutely no reciprocity. Reciprocation can be in ANY form.[/quote]

Reciprocity implies transactional because its an exchange of sorts. Doing something and expecting reciprocity is only going to lead to hurt feelings and disappointment or grievances.

You can only have very clear expectations- IME- with close friends, not parents of other kids you take to soccer somedays. I can say to my closest friend, Yes we want to see you but I can't do the car ride this time (knowing we have made the trip the last 3 out of 5 times we have seen them). Its hard for the baby to be in the car for 2+ hours can we meet in the middle or you guys come over here?

Also, do you ask for favors? I always offer but some people dont take me up on it and then I would hate to find out they actually think I dont reciprocate.Or if, instead of a playdate inside or a party I suggest meeting up at a park and bringing donuts and coffee but you decline. Not everyone reciprocates in 1:1. A few of husbands friends have huge houses and pools with crazy summer parties, but we cant reciprocate that exact environment.  [/quote]

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