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[quote=Anonymous]He is being rude. Just be direct back.  Why isn't he talking to his sibling about it?

We are constantly traveling to visit family since both sides live a plane or long (5-8 hours) car ride away.  Family occasionally visit us.  When they do, I have food I know they will eat, beer and wine, and water to drink.  My MIL is diabetic and can't have certain foods, my nephew is  allergic to a bunch of nuts so none of that can be in the house. 
I have another relative who does actually get sick by certain spices so can't actually have a variety of food.

I cook a lot of hard boiled eggs, get chicken and tuna salad, make a big salads and cut up fresh fruit and veggies all in the fridge before guests arrive.  I also have favored drinks and snacks, so people feel comfortable.

I visit family and it's tough to get there after a long journey and for them to say, "we didn't know what to buy" or just have muffins and cookies, but nothing fresh.  I end up going out and buying fresh food at both my mom's house and my in-laws house.

In regards to the mattress he should have told your spouse.  My in-laws had the most uncomfortable mattress ever and my MIL's brother told her straight to her face that the bed was awful.

My in-laws bought a new mattress and were grateful someone told them.  My mom has an old mattress that with two people sleeping is not great and I always come home with a sore back.  I ended up buying a mattress pad and told her I bought it for the bed. She was offended and told me to take it home with me.  So when I visit over Christmas we will be staying 2 nights max or paying for an expensive hotel.

We have a guest room, but when my in-laws stay we give them our primary and we sleep in the guest room that shares a family bathroom.  That way they get their own bathroom and have a king sized bed.

Your BIL is being rude.  Do you visit and stay a week at his house? I would talk to your spouse and have them talk to BIL.  Can they make a shorter trip?

I will say it is annoying to travel to see family and feel like you need to leave after a couple days.  BUT whenever we visit my in-laws for a week or longer (at their request) it is WAYYY too long.  [/quote]

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