Reply to Review your elementary school!

Forum Index » DC Public and Public Charter Schools

Reply to "Review your elementary school!"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Would one (or all) of the people who wrote or +1’d that post about graduating from a title I elementary school be willing to do an AMA? We may be in this position. We’re having a wonderful experience at our title I school but more and more of the other white/UMC families leave every year - starting next year we’ll be one of just a couple left. I have a ton of questions about your experience. [/quote]

Ask some questions! I would answer. We stayed at a Title 1 until 4th, I have lots of complicated thoughts about the school experience, about what to do for middle school, and about what makes a school "good enough." I also moved my younger kid to a very highly rated non-Title 1 DCPS and have lots of points of actual comparison. [/quote]

PP here who asked for the AMA. Here are my questions (would be interested in answers from anyone with a child who actually had a kid go all the way through 4th or 5th grade at a title I school):

1) Were you able to make “family friends” via your kids school (where the kids were friends and the parents were friends) despite race/class/cultural differences? [b]If yes, can you offer any tips on how to make that happen?[/b] If no, did you miss this?

2) Did your school have a lot of Spanish speaking families? Did your kid become friends with those kids? [b]If so, how did you navigate the language barrier with those parents?[/b]

3) Did you talk to your kid about the racial differences at his school? About racism? About the dynamics of being the only white kid in the class? If so, at what age(s)? Did you bring it up or did they? Did they seem to notice or care? We’re there every any hiccups around being the only (or one of a very few) white kids?

I know that’s a lot - happy to also provide a burner email or something if you’d rather talk directly. The bolded are honestly my biggest questions. We’re in a situation where I’ve ended up friends/friendly with mostly the white/UMC families, and they are leaving at high rates, and I’m not having a lot of luck bonding with the families of color (despite my efforts). The language barrier has been huge, plus just some unexpected differences (ex: aftercare is dominated by white families, which I wouldn’t have guessed, some black families are housing insecure and move often, there seems to be less of a culture of scheduling time in advance to get together to play. Even weird things like the white families are all at the pool from 10 or 11 to 1 and the black families are there more in like the 2-6 window). I’m sure a lot of this is a skill issue on my part, and I want to do better and learn but I’m struggling a bit and don’t want my kids to be left out due to my own social limitations/awkwardness.

Oh and if you haven’t been at a title 1 through 4/5, please don’t respond. I myself was HORRIFIED when I asked the neighbor with a kid a little older if she knew a lot of the parents at the school (when my kids were toddlers) and she said “sure, all the white parents” and now that I’ve lived it, I’m seeing how that happens and how hard it is to swim against that tide. [/quote]

I'm the PP with the teen, who attended our IB elementary and middle. I'll note that the "differences" between the kids included a mix of racial, cultural, immigration status, language, economic, learning differences, etc. My kid made friends easily with kids with all of those differences.

1. Adult/family friendships from school tended to be mostly exchanging phone numbers (usually each in each other's contacts only as "X's mom"), maybe following each other on social media to love posts, etc. Only a tiny handful of families became friends to the level of socializing outside of school events, and those families moved out of the area.

2. Yes, many Spanish-speaking families, and my kid made friends with them. For the parents I interacted with, again the social media mentioned above, and texting using Google Translate. And the universal language of cheering together on the sidelines!

3. In Pk4, my kid asked why their skin was different from everyone else's. I replied that, yeah, their skin might be lighter, but I bet their friends also liked XYZ activities, ABC foods, they were caring and liked school, etc. Kid agreed. It came up once or twice more in early elementary but passed quickly after similar conversations. There was an instance at school with another kid using a racial slur toward mine, but the staff shut that down right away and said they'd been having other issues with said kid.

In later elementary, my kid commented that, "in olden times, my friends wouldn't be allowed to play on the same playground with me," and they felt sad about that. We should all be so lucky to internalize injustice and inequity so young; it's easier than how we are now often unlearning unconscious bias.

In middle, my kid selected Spanish as their language specifically so they could better communicate with friends and teammates. They also *loved* going on outings with another family because that mom "makes THE BEST FOOD," and would spend hours in the kitchen trying to recreate dishes other friends brought for lunch (particularly West African).

If you'll post a burner email, I'm happy to reach out. Like the articulate PP who prompted this discussion, I've felt these experiences have had a huge impact on our whole family and on our community, and I do think about it a lot.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics