Reply to Pouting, sulking, silent treatment

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]He's manipulating you and doing it because he's getting what he wants/a reaction.  It's not great that he is capable of doing this as it's emotionally abusive and dysfunctional.  I think that's where a therapist comes in.

Two of your stories are situations where you don't need to be present...a field trip and a 10 year old birthday party.  I would try to really just dis-engage and pull back from anything other than basic needs and see what happens.  Stop telling him to stop or talking about it at all.  Why are you even finding out the reason hours later?  Are you probing?   Who cares.  If he sulks and is silent, his loss.  Carry on with your life and ignore him.[/quote]

OP here, and I appreciate this advice. But what do I do in the moment? He absolutely looks like a brat for sitting things out or moping along when it’s unnecessary.[/quote]

Let him experience that. You are acting like the behavior makes sense somehow and keeping the cycle going.

I would get on a neuropsych list for him. He should care more about peers even if he lacks skills and self regulation. Check out the book unstuck and on target and consider a social skills based class or camp. The social worker at school may do a lunch bunch where they work on skills.

Focus on DH, regular date nights and time with peers like a book club for you. If his behavior gives you social anxiety, do CBT or DBT for yourself. You can let a disordered kid have so much control over your emotions, not good for either of you. Get your cup filled by adults and work to stop reacting to him, walk away. Take the power back and regulate your own response.

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