Reply to Why do we tolerate trash talking and elitism as "boys will be boys" behavior?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m a parent of a 4th grade DD who had been warned about how difficult tween and teen girls were and how mean they are to each other. I was always told that boys were straightforward and easy.

It’s been shocking to see girls rally together and be supportive and kind, and to see the cruel, aggressive and constant work boys exert to establish and maintain a pecking order and their place in it. (I just wrote basically the same thing on the special needs thread and it isn’t worth rephrasing) Girl moms talked for years about relational aggression, but now I think it’s who who are really pushing the boundaries of what that can look like.

We have multiple boys at our school leaving because they’ve basically been driven out by this alpha boy nonsense. [/quote]

I agree and have seen this too. I have 2 girls and my anecdotal observation is that parents seem very quick to discipline their girls vs boys. I don’t get it. Girls (not all but most in my observation) are quick to be kept in check but parents give boys so much leeway for things like screaming,  inappropriate or mean language, being physically rough etc. It’s so dispiriting. There seems to be so much coddling of boys vs trying to make girls tough enough to handle those boys. [/quote]

Yes! Rather than attempt to discipline boys for bad behavior,[b] my DD and her friends were told by the counselors and the assistant principal that they needed to find a way to manage their reactions because that’s just how the boys were going to be.[/b]

To the teachers’ credit, they were appalled. But also stuck.[/quote]

As a 3 girl my mom my next calls would be to the executive principal, the assistant superintendent's office, and the superintendent's office.

The principal's hands might be tied or whatever, but on no account would they be allowed to make my girls think they were the problem.

--3 girl mom[/quote]

Oh, don’t worry, we escalated after that. And my DD and her 3 friends who were targeted the most will be at another school next year! [/quote]

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