Reply to Broken Marriage, Different Places on Where to Go

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Married 10 years, with two kids under the of 8, one with significant special needs.

The marriage has been in a [b]downward spiral since the pressures/stresses with the kids[/b], with a pretty strep decline during the pandemic. After a failed attempt at marriage therapy, we fell into mode where we effectively became cordial roommates for the last couple years. We give each other space at home, but things are well enough that we can go out with friends and do some family outings.

But the love is gone. I recoil at physical proxity, much less touch, and even find the voice difficult to listen to.

Divorce would be financially and logistically distasterous. And given the significant support needs of one of our kids, it's hard to imagine one person being able to care for the kids. So. either of us views divorce as a plausible option.

In our discussions, we both seem to acknowledge that things gone far enough that there's no going back. I'm of the opinion we double-down on that and accept this is what is sometimes called a parenting marriage. My spouse, not so much, but doesn't have much of an alternative to offer.

I don't really know where to go from here. [b]I've been pretty clear I'd agree to a divorce, but that I don't think either of us could handle it logistically[/b].[/quote]

Oh this is a dude. So special needs kid precipitated a “downward spiral” because you actually have to help parent. Not fun huh. So in your last paragraph you’re urging her to leave because you are broke and don’t want to be the bad guy? 😒[/quote]

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