Reply to Nephew with celiac - what is fair/appropriate when visiting grandma?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You sound like my SIL, OP. My children have multiple allergies, including gluten and dairy. My SIL showed up at every single family gathering with a food that my child could not eat. She'd always say, "Oh, Larla can't eat the BUTTER on the green beans?" Everyone else respected my DC's allergies and brought food she could eat. But my SIL always wanted her kids "favorites."

My child could die if she eats certain foods. Everyone in the family understands and respects this, except for SIL., who found it a total PITA to bring an allergen-free food to a family holiday celebration.

My entire family eats GF foods. There are lots that are fine. They are indistinguishable from wheat-based foods: breads, pasta, cookies, cakes, etc.

As a PP said, it's really difficult to feed a child with multiple allergies. Be grateful you only have to feed your children GF foods for a few days. You have it easy, OP. Gratitude is the key to happiness. [/quote]

deep sigh....eyes rolling[/quote]

no kidding. Can't believe the sancimommies on this thread. Nothing OP has said indicates that she is like the SIL above, yet all these people are projecting every negative thing they can think of on her.[/quote]

It's like this: when you hear about a two year old family member with a serious, chronic illness that requires special dietary needs, you accommodate those needs. It's a few days of dealing with it  for your family. That kid is going to deal with it for the rest of his life.

Arguing about it makes you a selfish asshole. You haven't talked to the kid's doctors or specialists. You haven't gone through the patient education.  You haven't read the bazillion pages of research that the kid's mom has read in order to understand the disease. If you argue about it, you are an asshole.  That includes OP.[/quote]

What if OP had posted this:

"Not sure how to handle this upcoming situation. My husband and I both work full time at pretty stressful jobs and because we have little kids and both our families live out of state, most of our vacations are to visit family. This summer we are supposed to visit his parents and his brother's family at their summer house on a lake in Maine, which is about two hours from where they all live (which is also the closest town with a Target, etc) but four hours drive from Manchester NH (the nearest airport with direct flights from DC). His brother and SIL have a newborn and a 2-year-old who was recently diagnosed with celiac. His parents lake house also has a small cabin with a kitchenette. We understand that because of the celiac thing that they want to keep the kitchen gluten free. However, they also want to stay in the cabin because of the baby--which means there is no space where we can make stuff like Eggos and PB&J sandwiches and hot dogs. Honestly, the thought of spending basically an entire day traveling with a 3-year-old and a 5-year-old to spend the only week I get to take off this summer with my in-laws already doesn't sound like much of a vacation, but whatever, its family, its what we have to do. But am I being unreasonable for thinking that since they have a completely separate kitchenette that we can keep my nephew out of, they should let us use it?"

I don't think that sounds like an asshole. I can't believe how judgy all you people are.[/quote]

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