Reply to I was an AP and now I'm a wife, AMA

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Reply to "I was an AP and now I'm a wife, AMA"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes we have. We said if either one of us are unhappy in the marriage we'll talk to each other first and figure out how to work through it.[/quote]
I think pretty much every married couple feels that way in the beginning.  But, sometimes, push comes to shove, and communication can break down.

I'm just saying, don't look at this marriage through rose colored glasses or be so naive.  My DH and I know that however slim a chance, one of us could cheat one day.  Obviously, we hope this never happens, but I am not naive enough to think that divorce could never happen to us. Right now, I'd be shocked if it did, but never say never, as they say.[/quote]

I'm not trying to be naive, I just truly think things are different. Yeah I know divorce is possible in any marriage. What's wrong with being positive and working to make and my marriage strong?[/quote]

Nothing is wrong with it, but your attitude comes across as "it won't happen to me".  And it really doesn't help that you created this AMA.  Really, what was the purpose of this AMA if not to flaunt it, or think you're somehow better than other wives whose husbands have cheated on them?[/quote]

+1.

OP, you haven't offered us any insight that would justify a thoughtful AMA. You were the AP. How is your relationship with your H different now that you are a wife? Do you feel differently about APs now that you are married? How would you feel if your husband cheated on you the way he did with you? What have you learned about relationships based on this experience?

Consider things that you yourself have experienced - not things that your husband has told you that someone else said or did or thought. You are never going to know who his ex actually is because you will always only think of her as his ex and she will only ever think of you as the woman who destroyed her marriage. Maybe it was as terrible a marriage as your H says, maybe not, but it was hers and you and your H ruined it.[/quote]

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