Reply to Did a 180 and decided to redshirt my child- question for parents who decided to do the same

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Reply to "Did a 180 and decided to redshirt my child- question for parents who decided to do the same"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I struggled before deciding to have my June birthday DC repeat preschool at a charter in DC because I worry about the eventual stigma. But I decided to do it b/c he has significant developmental delays. It is really surprising to me that people would do this just b/c their kid who is doing a-OK in school doesn't like being one of the younger kids.[/quote]

This is the thing that has always been striking to me about this debate. I think there are two things going on:

1. What schools expect behavior-wise for 3-, 4-, 5-year-olds isn't particularly developmentally appropriate. Our culture is pretty bifurcated vis-a-vis children's school and many parents' employment. I know that my child, who is 5 (mid-May birthday, no delays, going into K in August), would prefer a shorter school day, but the earliest I can pick her up is about 5pm. Her school is very play-based, so it's not like she's sitting quietly in chairs, but she's there from 8:30 until 5:30, which is a long time no matter what you're doing.

[b]2. Most people expect that if your child needs to repeat a grade, it indicates a serious issue. Developmental delays, incredibly poor academic performance, etc. Their first thought is not going to be "Xander doesn't want to be the youngest kid."[/quote][/b]

And this is unlikely to change anytime in the future.  Kids absolutely notice and ask about this by 1st grade, and they call it "held back" not red shirting.  Parents who chose this for their children should prepare them for how to handle it with other kids because although you may call it red shirting, their peers will call it held back.[/quote]

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