Reply to Just accepting unequal division of labor

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Just accepting unequal division of labor"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My marriage had been really tainted by the inequity in our workload. Dh has adhd. Likely in large part because of this, I do the lions share of everything. I make about 4x the salary, work much much harder; and have to remember almost all of the kid and household  admin. It’s not that he *wont* do it but it’s sort of positioned as that he *cannot* do as much as me and therefore would just - if left to own devices - let many many many things slide (clean clothes/ kids shower/ kids eat any vegetables/ submit mandatory forms to school/ buy birthday presents for other kids parties etc etc). I sit there every night working and doing admin till I go to bed basically while he unwinds. I do not want to share time with kids and I know the dcum party line is don’t divorce unless it’s awful. And he does have in theory many good qualities. But the inequity in our relationship is just bananas. I have addressed it all I can and this is the best it’s going to get. Is there any solution? [/quote]

How old are your kids?

Can you hire more help? Sounds like maybe someone to deliver premade meals could help. An accountant to do your finances? Tutors to help kids with hw?

I think the only solution is to program him to do more simple tasks. I’m sorry, but if he can follow a list he should be able to do showers for the kids, dishes, wipe counters, trash, run loads of laundry and fold, pack lunches, etc. Sit him down and say I’m working for hours after work and I need you to help me with XYZ so I can have time to wind down also.

[b]TeuxDeux[/b] is a good app with a list that you can program to have daily repeatable items. Maybe you can even share an account and add things to it.

Try to simplify your life as much as possible. Buy multiples of one or two kinds of birthday presents and a pack of ten bags. Do some of the kid admin on your lunch break.[/quote]

Did someone actually think that "deux" is pronounced "do?" That's pretty embarrassing. 
[/quote]

That’s pretty similar to how it sounds in French (like un, deux, trois), what are you talking about?[/quote]

No it's not. [/quote]

Are you from Louisiana and think the French would pronounce it like “toe doe”? Bahhahaha talk about embarrassing! You’re lucky this is anon. [/quote]

No, sweetheart, it’s not pronounced “do” or “doe.” Tell me you don’t speak French without telling me you don’t speak French. I think you’re the one who’s lucky this is anon.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics