Reply to WWYD? Being asked NOT to bring a new spouse and children

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[quote=Anonymous]It has been 5 years and they are adults. They get invited but they decide if they're coming.

Like it or not the "other woman" and her kids are family and, at some point, you get past it to at least be able to be at forced family events. If they don't want to, FINE, and you'll see them the next day or whatever.

I say this as a kid whose parents divorced when I was an adult (very ugly). My DH whose parents divorced b/c of infidelity (among other things) and the "other person" has been married to the "cheater" for 20+  years. At some point we told them we are having 1 event for things and they can come or not. But, we are not doing multiple (baptisms, birthdays, wedding parties, thanksgivings, etc. whatever) and if they do come, they are expected to be civil. If they cannot, they can leave or will be asked to leave.

I get that this sh-- can be traumatic. I get it more than you know. But, at some point you have to move past it for your own health and well-being. You don't have to like, accept, want to be around the "other woman", but you should be able to be in the same room to say a civil hello (barring things like abuse, violence, etc., which negates all the above).[/quote]

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