Reply to Support Group for middle aged husbands not having sex

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So there's another thread going here where one of the commenter was suggesting that sex was going to be contingent on the woman getting a massage or a pedicure, the husband arranging a sitter, and going out on a date night. Here there was a commenter talking about a 2 week vacation.

This isn't novel. These kinds of things get mentioned pretty much every time this subject crops up. What's never clear to me is whether the expectation is that this sort of free time and expenditure of money is more or less necessary every time the couple wants to have sex. Or is this something that will happen every once in awhile and enable the couple to maintain a regular sex life.

Because (say) 8 pedicures, date nights, and sitters a month -- let alone vacations -- sounds time consuming and expensive. [/quote]

Look, I don’t get any pedicures, date nights, solo vacations or any of the stuff. What I do get is a husband who cooks, cleans, does laundry, shops, steps up on childcare, is willing to discuss his feelings and my needs, and hash out bigger picture things to support me in my career and personal life. We have sex as much as he wants. When you have a good one, it just flows naturally.[/quote]

This is true from the guy’s perspective too. All this quid pro quo stuff is weird and unhealthy, and probably never works. [/quote]

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