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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]I think that the issue is that some parents of small children don't keep an eye on their small children.  I think the bride and groom, when taking the invite list into consideration, have a good read on who is a lazy, selfish parent and who will be responsible. The bride and groom act accordingly.  Can you blame them?  It is the single biggest event of their lives, up to then.[/b]

For example, have you ever been to a wedding where the small child (too young to know any better) is jumping over the church pews, running around the church, screaming bloody murder in church so that the vows can not be heard, running and chasing and knocking down elderly grandparents, stepping on the bridal train and ripping the bride's dress, or smashes the entire wedding cake to the ground at the reception?  All because the parents were too busy chatting away, or drinking, dancing, or anything but paying attention.

Unfortunately, the lazy, selfish parents ruin it for the responsible parents, such that a blanket rule (such as "adults only") has to be applied.  I know weddings where the bride and groom welcomed certain small children, because they knew it would not be a fiasco - but had to make a blanket "no children" statement, because they knew that one or two parents in particular would make it an unruly free for all.  Let's face it, some parents don't pay attention, and it is all about them.  If you want the relatives to meet your small child, make the necessary plans for that to happen, another time during the wedding weekend.

Better yet, plan a family reunion at your own leisure, so you can dictate the time, venue and guest list.[/quote]

Not to mention the most expensive event of their lives. But sure having a screaming toddler ruin a moment like this is hilarious.

[img]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AiAn5INrQw[/img][/quote]

That definitely can be a reason. Also, if they have 2 kids themselves, then probably most of their friends also have kids, plus relatives have kids, pretty soon you have doubled or more your guest list.  Sometimes the kids just have to be cut for space/budget reasons.  [/quote]

Maybe because I am French and we have different traditions but weddings without children seems downright sad to me. That's part of what makes it different tfrom another big soirée. It is a multi generational gathering. How fun to see the kids dancing with everyone, with the grandma, the college friends, the cousins.. kids can be loud but I have never seen a toddler ruining a wedding.[b] I heard babies cry in the church but you take them for a walk [/b]and it is part of life to have those newborn crying sounds in such a big gathering. I would dare say it even brings something, the full circle of life (and no I am not even religious).

And it is the parties that familie sremember, when you danced with our dad, fell asleep on the couch at 2 am, going to bed so late for the first time... I would never keep children away from a wedding...
[/quote]

I agree that reasonable parents, who are not dense and who are not paying attention, would take their screaming toddler or baby out of the church.  But there are parents (maybe its an American thing, I don't know) who really don't get it, they are lazy and ruin it for the rest of the parents.   Ideally, in a perfect world, parents would extend this common courtesy.  It is easy to tell who is not polite in the everyday - who is entitled - who is most likely to be a nightmare wedding guest.  I think some brides and grooms base their decision on who is a capable parent. Of course, if you say no to one, you have to say no to all. [/quote]

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