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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What do spankers make of all the average to well behaved children whose parents haven't/wouldn't spank? Given that it's obviously possible to raise children with fine behavior without resorting to spanking, what is the appeal of dpanking? Do you believe it works "faster"? Or do you not believe that there are lots of well behaved children whose parents would never spank? [/quote]
?  Do you think *all* kids are the same, and every discipline method works the exact same way on every kid?  I have two kids, and they are very different, and how I parent and discipline them are very different.  Your logic is weird.[/quote]

So it's a weird coincidence that I (and the vast majority of my friends and family) who knew from before pregnancy that spanking was not on the table all happened to have children whose temperaments didn't demand spanking? [/quote]

np. I have a feeling you spend a lot more time either "choosing your battles," as the euphemism goes, and/or managing an endless matrix of arbitrary incentives and penalties. And you or your friends probably still complain that the kids "just don't listen."[/quote]
+1  Different parents seem to have different definitions of "well behaved" child.

I saw a mom do nothing as her child took something from another child who was playing with it.  The child asked for it back, and the mom just looked at that kid and shrugged her shoulders.   She probably thinks her child is well behaved because he at least didn't hit that child or throw a tantrum.

And you read the posts about how some parents will go over the Principal to get their precious snowflakes out of trouble, and I bet these parents still think their children are well behaved because... you know, they get good grades and everything.[/quote]

"civil discussion" poster here - this isn't a problem with a lack of spanking though, it's parents without any boundaries. My parents spanked when we were growing up but also didn't intervene in things like this. I do choose my battles, which means that I don't force my child to wear the pink shirt if she preferred the black one or whatever - if my kids were not hurting, upsetting, or annoying someone else I tried to be pretty lenient - choosing to enforce only the bigger issues so i wasn't always the party of "no." However, I fully admit that lacking a "fear factor" means you basically cannot force your kids to do things they don't want to do without a battle. I guess it wasn't worth it or a priority to me to "force" my kids to do something. That meant getting compliance was a little bit different for me than for a spanker but by no means did I just sit there and let my kid hurt others. I think you're confusing no discipline with no spanking and again as i started this comment with, many spankers are also very sporadic with discipline overall... [/quote]

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