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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My in laws are mostly great, but this year something happened that makes me scratch my head.

My mother died several months ago.  The in laws knew that I was close to my mother.  I didn't think too much about it when they didn't contact me at the time of her death or consider coming to her funeral (they don't live close by; I would have been surprised if they came).  But I have seen them twice since she died and they have not said a word about her death, even after my mother came up in passing in conversation.

I don't get it.[/quote]

That is horrible. They no longer deserve to called "mostly great." What does your husband say about this?![/quote]

He didn't notice and I haven't brought it up.  I'm reluctant to let the relationship sour.  It seems cloddish behavior to me, and I do resent it, but I don't know that saying anything would be to anyone's benefit.[/quote]

I think you can let them know it hurt you without risking souring the relationship. [b]Their behavior seems really bizarre to me. [/b][/quote]

I think the next time it comes up naturally...her birthday, the holidays, Mother's Day, the anniversary of her death, make a toast to her or mention it. If they say nothing, say, "I want you to know that my mother is very important to me, and I need support in my grieving process." Then, if they continue to ignore, build up some emotional boundaries against those insensitive people.[/quote]

Cold, like my MIL and the ILs.  Awful - I empathize with you, PP.

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