Reply to Sister says 14yo nephew not coming to my wedding because of his sports tournament. Thoughts?

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Reply to "Sister says 14yo nephew not coming to my wedding because of his sports tournament. Thoughts?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My guess is that most of the people posting here who believe the kid and his mom are being selfish have no conception of how selfish it is to want someone else to put their life on hold for their "big day" or how hypocritical it is to say they're prioritizing "supporting the family" by forcing a family member to forgo something they've worked quite hard for.

If "supporting the family" is so important, how about we all grow up and support the boy going to his sporting event, which (a) understandably means more to him than his aunts wedding considering the amount of time he's likely put into it, and (b) shouldn't ultimately change how his aunt feels about her wedding day one bit.

It's a good practice to at least analyze the size of the benefit to you against the size of the sacrifice you're making someone else make.[/quote]

You have a seriously messed up world view if you think one tournament of many sports tournamens is even remotely equivalent to the celebration of a family member's wedding.  If the niece is not there, I don't look at it in terms of the benefit or loss to the bride; it's a loss to the whole extended family to have someone missing like that.  These are "all call" extended family occasions.  Or at least they are in my family where we treasure the rare times we are all together from far-flung countries and states and walks of life.  We come together to welcome and bless a new family, to welcome a new child, and to hold each other close when one of us has died.  Sometimes we are lucky enough to have other milestones to gather to celebrate, like my grandmother's 90ty birthday and aunt and uncle's 60th wedding anniversary. These are seen as more optional than weddings, though, where we see it as a sacred responsibility to join in support and celebration of the newly wedded couple.  Cheering someone kicking a ball, when they do the ball kicking nearly every weekend over the course of many years, isn't remotely equivalent. My mind is really blown by people who value family so little and elevate exercise, competitive games, and hobbies so highly.[/quote]

Holy cow! Take a Xanax.[/quote]

Haha, I'm the PP, and you're right, I'm bizarrely amp'd up by this thread.  I need to step away from the keyboard.  Thanks for the blunt reality check.  :)[/quote]

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