Reply to How to forgive spouse for initiating a gray divorce?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]You don't have to forgive him.[/b]

Forgive yourself for being mad. It's understandable you're mad. Let yourself feel your anger, talk to someone about it (therapist, friend, someone) but release yourself from it.

Someone once did something really awful to me and they never apologized or even took responsibility for it. For a long time I kept telling myself I had to forgive them (partly because other people kept telling me I'd never move on if I didn't forgive them). But I couldn't! How can you forgive someone who isn't even sorry for the harm they caused?

But then one day I decided to just accept that I couldn't forgive them, and I decided it was fine, and that gave me the release I needed to move on. Some people suck. You don't have to let them off the hook (they can figure that out themselves) but you can let yourself off the hook.

Wishing you peace, OP.[/quote]

Many if not most gray divorces are initiated by women [/quote]

Agree! because by this age the men are way too accustomed to having and eating the cake and dont want to leave the comfort that the home provides.

Signed-one of those women who initiated[/quote]

So the conventional wisdom around these parts: When a man initiates a gray divorce, he must be a jerk and the woman is right to be angry. When the woman initiates a gray divorce, the woman is justified because the guy must be a jerk. Very sound logic.[/quote]

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