Reply to Anyone’s exDH try to use family caregiving for custody?

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Reply to "Anyone’s exDH try to use family caregiving for custody?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Traveling for work isn't 'gallivanting'. It's called providing for your family. My late father traveled for work at some points and trust me, he was our dad 100% of the time.[/quote]

This doesn't sound like a dad who is doing 100% here, with all due respect to your dad and other parents who do only the travel necessary to maintain an income and a career.[/quote]

True, but OP isn’t doing 100% either.  Providing financially for your kid is a huge part of parenting.  OP is clear that she has, in the past, relied on his income.  Which is fine, but it means that she has also never done 100% of the parenting, and while she is asking for grace as she transitions to a career that can provide more $, she is very angry about him needing similar grace as he sorts out how to provide more time.

The solution here seems to be a ROFR that kicks in on the 2nd consecutive overnight.  [/quote]

I've never heard of a 2nd consecutive overnight ROFR. At least not in my jurisdiction. This seems like it would be even more disruptive and against the best interests of the children.

A night at mom's, a night with dad's caregiver, and then back to mom's? A PP above said that kids aren't objects to be shuffled around, and I agree, and this arrangement would do exactly that. [/quote]

A ROFR that kicks in at 24 hours is a great thing.  It allows the parent to send their kid on sleepovers, or to have Grandma visit and spend a night in a hotel, or to let the kid go with a friend to a soccer tournament, while still preventing the ex from arranging long periods of time where the kid is being cared for by god knows who.

In this case,  where OP is specifically worried about grandparent care, it seems unlikely that Dad is going to fly a grandma into town for one night, so it could result in Mom just being allowed to keep the kid.  But if Dad does fly someone in, then a one night sleepover with Grandma is a very normal thing.  Lots of kids in intact families go to Grandma for a sleepover on a regular basis.  That's not "shuffling around" or super disruptive.  It's a normal healthy family dynamic.  [/quote]

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