Reply to Why are people here so averse to pushing their kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Dc knows no screen time for 1 month with every B on report card starting middle school. I’m well aware of the risk that they might play video games all day long in the future when I have no control of their devices. The hope is they’ll have better self-control when older. Now 10th grade, still straight A. So at least works for now. [/quote]

Your kid is likely doing it because of EXTERNAL motivation - i.e. fear of negative consequences imposed by you, the parent.

Maybe once your DC leaves the house and goes to college, this will somehow be transformed into INTERNAL motivation - i.e. doing it because they want to or according to their own internal system of values.

I hope so. Otherwise you’re either going to have to cut the cord and watch as they try to discover self-motivation in college, or they’ll wash out because mommy and daddy aren’t breathing down their neck anymore. (Or you’ll continue on the hands-on path - as one of those overly-involved, boundary-less parents who knows when their college kid’s tests/papers are due and nags/reminds/checks in to see if they’re on track.  :roll: [/quote]

That might be true. I guess it’s because I do a lot of thing for external motivation. I work hard for higher income and promotions, or because of fear of no job.  
I don’t think it’s that bad. They  might fail later, or they fail now. Even I let them be now, there is no guarantee they’ll be self motivated later. Also, some of the external factors (such as grades) will impact their lives for a long time. [/quote]

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