Reply to When one sibling lives in parents' house

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You need to move out of your in-law's house. A DIL should not be providing elder care IMO. It will only cause resentment from all sides.[/quote]

Why? [/quote]

This makes zero sense if a daughter or son will not step up.  I did all the care for my MIL.  My husband is very good to me.  Why wouldn't I help him care for his mom when I had the time and flexibility and he didn't?[/quote]

Sure, if the siblings won't step up. I'm speaking of families where the kids/parents are supportive and local. Since DIL lives in the house, does she start taking MIL to the doctor? Is she the keeper/relayer of medical information then? I've witnessed this. The bio kids are pushed out. This Christmas thing notwithstanding, but OP is already making decisions about what happens in IL's own house. What happens if the husband passes and the kids move out? Is she living in the house with the ILs?

This is all fine as a temporary measure while her husband is sick and they are figuring things out, but I would make a plan for the future. [/quote]

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