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Tweens and Teens
Reply to "Pre-Teen is resentful of how much I work "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote]NP here and I don't agree. I believe a two parent household can work together as a team, to balance out the emotional needs a preteen has in a way that can overcome the long hours or travel obligations of one of the parents. 17:35 explained it very well above. This is not about OP's hours - it's about the work schedule of BOTH of the parents in this household. I don't think one parent needs to be a SAH parent, but I do think at least one parent needs to cut back on the workload and be realistic about the obligations raising three children requires.[/quote] I agree with everything except the last part. Both parents need to cut back a little and raise their kids. Children deserve 2 parents. They obviously have enough money to take care is the obligation that are not child related... Cooking, cleaning, fixing the car. If a SAHP does all those thing to free up time for the father.... And the father is "fully engaged"... Then OP and her H could, in theory, hire someone to do all those chores... So they can both be fully engaged. I personally disagree that H in this situation are fully engaged.... So really they both need to cut back. Also, SAHP with a H working tons need to figure out how to either spend less or make money so their H have time to emotionalky support their kids. [/quote] DP here. Regarding your last sentence - again: many SAHPs have spouses who are home early every night and spend tons of time with their kids. It's pretty much a DCUM myth that all SAHPs have spouses working late hours every night. :roll: [/quote] I agree that most SAHPs have fathers that come home early and are with their kids every night. I also agree that most WOHP have two parents that come home early and both are fully engaged with their kids. All I am saying is that kids don't need 1 parent they need 2, when possible. It's not a good model to say, well I stay at home so it's okay my H never sees the kids, I can fulfill all their every need. When people give OP advise to cut back or SAH so their kids have 1 parent I disagree, I think OP [b]and [/b]her H need to cut back... kids need 2 parents. Not sure why that is a controversial statement but it has obviously hit a nerve with some posters and I doubt it is posters who truly believe their H is fully engaged, its parents that realize they have condoned their H being absent for money and believe their being present is enough. [/quote] You have truly beat this dead horse until there's nothing left to say. You refuse to see what multiple posters have patiently been explaining to you, so I won't bother (again). You don't make any sense at all, and several people have called you on it. :roll: [/quote]
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