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[quote=Anonymous]OP, you sound like a lovely man who is at his wit's end. I feel for you and all the other men who suffer in silence with this burden while their wives bully them into accepting a SAHM situation. I've heard it all from my girlfriends, from "it was all his idea really" this works better for our family" "I could be out there making all this money but I'm sacrificing for the good of the children"
If you get a few drinks in the husband and ask him what he really thinks, they're all like you. I've only ever met one man who was truly happy with his SAHM wife and the rest just weakly smile followed by a yes dear. 
The burden of worrying whether you can manage food and roof over your head while also figuring out college savings/retirement is enough to drive a person insane. 
My DH makes enough that I can stay at home. However, I am a lawyer in a very specialized field that can command a very nice 6 figure salary with a very flexible schedule. My income allows us to vacation, wear nice clothes, eat well, private school for kids, and amazing health insurance. It amazes me how many lists and studies women pull out to avoid working once they have kids. For every study that advocates mom's staying home, there's one that says working moms produce more successful daughters and courteous sons. 
Sounds like you contribute equally to parenting and it's a shame your wife doesn't appreciate your efforts. I hope you follow the suggestions on this board and curb her spending allowance. When the cafe latte money dries up, she'll be loading up those hours. [/quote]

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