Reply to This Girl Scout cookie typifies my horrible marriage.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just a note to say I'm with you OP.  I have a similar DH who can't seem to handle even these "easy" tasks and it is maddening how I have to do everything.

I've decided that it is just because he doesn't care enough to get it right.  If it mattered to him, he would do it (as evidenced by his excellent job performance).  For some reason, in his mind, tasks like this don't require his full effort and attention.  I don't know if he has admitted this to himself, but I see it clearly.

But don't think he can't tell me about the youtube video he watched today or what XYZ was posted on facebook or what fantasy sports are doing ... [/quote]

Do you love him less because he can't do these "easy" task.[/quote]

No, I don't love him less.  I find it maddening, but I've mostly accepted it.  If I want things done "right", I just take care of it myself or hire it out (i.e. that house maintenance item that is on his to-do list and he bought some parts, but didn't get the right ones, and its just been languishing).  I no longer expend emotional energy fighting to get him to do these things, nor do I spend (much) emotional energy annoyed that he doesn't do them.  I've tried the "relax and let him do it is own way and/or natural consequences will teach him next time" school of thought, but it didn't work for me.  What resulted what laundry that was never done, clothes that were ruined, dishes put away in places where they couldn't be located when we needed them, etc.  I got sick of dealing with the consequences, and these consequences never seemed to phase or "teach" DH.

Like OP I occasionally vent to the anonymous internet so that I can get it off my chest, but for our home life, I just don't really give into the emotional suck that this could be.  DH is a wonderful person/soul, is kind and loving towards me and our children, and is the "fun" dad. [b] I do hope to teach my son to not follow these patterns.  [/b]    [/quote]

good luck with that. do you work full-time and deal with all of this?[/quote]

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