Reply to SAHMs, do you worry about your husband leaving you?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]SAHM you don't want to know how I spend my days. Just very slowly. I only do things I like and feel like doing. It is a surprise to me when I have to rush. Don't like to so I take it easy. Spend a lot of time on vacation and at the beach, with my family and riding my horse. Takes a lot of time to do these things at a leisurely pace. Worry about money, no not so much. Our equity just keep growing. Lots of hobbies and I sculpt. Love to cook.[/quote]

I'm the one that told people to "own it". Honestly, this is the type of SAHM I like. Keeping up her interests, not complaining about how hard her life is compared to everyone else. It's the kind of WOHM I like, too!

And, yes, we all Parent our children. The thing I hate the most is when a SAHM says something like "My job is TWENTY-FOUR HOURS!".....because working Moms don't come home to children and have Parenting also. We *all* work 24 hours.

And we should *all* be taking time for ourselves in order to remain interesting people.

And, lady, you had 5 kids. I will assume with you either planned them or were dumb about birth control while satisfying your wonderful sex life. I don't feel bad for you. Yes, most people don't have 5 kids.

In any case, the thread topic is just asking if you're worried about your finances, really. [/quote]

New poster from above again, you sound a little bitter, but I will not judge.  I am, like you, a working mother, but you put out there the fallacy that most SAHMs are enjoying the good life at the gym, the mall, and the board or bored lunches every day.  That is simply not true, many are, but most American SAHMs enjoy far from the easy life you envision.  The previous SAHM, it seems to me, was just setting you and us straight, by saying essentially, hey, every minute of my day is occupied by work also.  In fact, you are the one imputing laziness to her.  You also disparage her for not remaining interesting, but by the way, she mentioned that she does take time to better herself also through exercise, reading, and walks and time with her spouse.  Again, I will not judge you because I know how hard we working mothers have it, but you seem to be the one critical of stay at home mothers, and not the other way around.[/quote]

I'm not bitter about my life. I'm bitter about people listening to people whine all day about their righteous choices. In any case, I'm pretty sure my post was recognizing that we *all* work 24 hours. I didn't say their 8-12 was any less work than my 8-12. If you have small children that are home, yes, your day (in my opinion) is at least just as difficult as mine, if not more difficult. And yes, I think when Moms have kids in school and stay home all day their lives are less work than women who work outside the home and then come back to pick up their kids from school and make dinner and do laundry and pick up groceries. It just is. There is no way anyone is going to convince me otherwise. I have to do my work day AND the house work. But, once your kids are all in school, I'm sorry, no one is going to believe that your day is difficult. And, you may be politically correct and pretend you don't agree, but there's no way you don't agree.

That said, I think that a lot of men prefer their wives to stay home and would be more likely to leave if their wives decided to work. So, for some women it's not an option if they want to keep their family together.[/quote]

Previous poster who is a working mom, and to whom you are responding, I agree with a lot of what you describe, with the exception of your persistent characterization of stay-at-home mothers who have school age children as working any less than working mothers.  Sure we working mothers work, and take care of our children, but a lot of us get help with the house cleaning, or from family or babysitters.  Your characterization comes from a very privileged point of view.  Visit a stay-at-home mother in most anyplace normal in America, and tell me that keeping house like cleaning bathrooms, scrubbing ovens and toilets, mopping floors, doing laundry, cooking homemade meals, mowing grass, driving the kids everywhere, etc. cannot take the better part of your life away. You admit as much yourself in saying that you do not want to spend your day as a glorified maid.  As a working mom, I take some shortcuts by buying prepared meals at Whole Foods, and I allow myself the luxury of a cleaning service once a week, and a shared nanny who fixes up things three times a week.  I think that if you were honest with yourself, you would admit to these things also.[/quote]

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