Reply to S/O - Why does DCUM hate this kind of woman so much?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Spinoff from this thread in Beauty and Fashion.

TL/DR - A woman is miffed that her recently laid off cousin showed up at Thanksgiving looking nice. Too nice. She cites the woman's Cartier Love bracelet and VCA necklace as evidence that the cousin was obnoxiously "dripping" in designer goods. Posters rightly pointed out that the woman only had a few designer items on and OP likely only noticed them because she was jealous and wanted them herself. Shockingly, OP has not returned. (https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1242233.page)

But here's what I'm really curious about. Someone posted this:

[quote]This may be an unpopular opinion but I like basic rich suburban mom style. It’s not me but give me a highlighted hair, nails done, lulu wearing soccer mom with Cartier bangles and a van cleef arpel necklace any day. You know it’s not unique and you don’t feel like you need to prove you are interesting with what you are wearing. I say, get it girl. Grab your neverfull and pick up those kiddos from soccer practice.[/quote]

Why does DCUM hate this woman so much? I think the whole "I prefer a WASPier aesthetic" thing is just pretext. Because she's happy to lean in to conventional design aesthetics?  Is it because this woman is competition for higher value men? I just don't get it.[/quote]

That’s not my post, but what I don’t understand is the endless DCUM insistence that everyone is “jealous.” Designer brands are a waste of money. I would never buy them even if we were multimillionaires. Yes, really. No, it’s not “cope because you can’t afford it.”

“They’re just jealous” is the line your mom feeds you in middle school when the other girls are being “mean” to you and she says “oh honey, they’re just jealous of you.” You were supposed to grow out of believing it when you became an adult.[/quote]

+1, "you're just jealous" is like "I'm rubber and you're glue." It's a childish retort to avoid actually addressing a valid criticism.

I can afford these items but would not buy them because [b]I'd rather spend that money on almost anything else. A vacation. A piece of art. My kid's college fund. Concert tickets.[/b] I do not understand spending thousands on a basic gold bangle and a tote bag.

It's the female version of men who spend money on cars and watches. Do what you want but yes I do judge you for being shallow and bad with money.[/quote]

Why are your preferences for how you spend/waste your money more valid than another woman’s?[/quote]

NP but I’ll respond here by saying that the thing people object to is that folks are buying these items purely for the optics to others. They’re spending money to be seen differently, as opposed to perhaps something they actually like. Now are those things confounded, sure, but honestly why else is someone buying an easily recognizable designer item? It’s a status symbol plain and simple [/quote]

This is crazy to me. We’re talking about a pretty small potatoes spending category. Like the whole “designer clothing” category could only add up to what, $50k? You’re all living in houses that differ in price by way more than that. Driving cars that differ by more than that. Paying for schools that differ by more than that. It doesn’t make sense for clothing to be a status symbol. You can buy a $20k Chanel bag if you have $21k in the bank. This is a terrible way to signal or measure “status.”[/quote]

Agree with this. Not to mention if yo work in certain fields you know everyone makes enough to afford this stuff if they wanted to.[/quote]

I don't hate someone who dresses this way but I do often think "do better." And that's specifically because I know what this stuff costs and I know the person in question can afford it. And I also know that of you can afford to do this look head to toe, you cabe the money and resources to dress soooo much better.

I like fashion and I like seeing people in interesting and stylish clothes. I don't consider the look being discussed on this thread to be interesting or stylish, so to me it's a missed opportunity. Here's a person with the money, time, and interest to look truly stylish, but they are defaulting to these generic rich lady items and style choices.

Basically I want this women to trade in her bracelets for a decent stylist and find a look that is more original and stylish. I'd never say that out loud but I'm also not going to gush over someone's generic, label-heavy and style-light outfit. Sorry not sorry.[/quote]

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