Reply to Vent: Invited to 4 child-free weddings this summer

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This thread is a great example of internalized misogyny. Why are so many of you assuming it is the bride that, unilaterally, decided it would be a child-free wedding? Even if it were the bride's suggestion, it's a decision the couple made.

How can so many of you get to the age you have and STILL not recognize that what you prefer is not someone else's preference, what you can afford, someone else can't or what you believeva wedding constitutes (or should be) isn't shared by everyone?

Calling brides narcissists because a wedding is child-free is just sour grapes and doesn't reflect well on you. I sincerely hope those who do don't consider themselves feminists because you really aren't respecting choice.
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Please... do you really think men are driving most wedding plans?  I'm a NP, but many in the U.S. have totally lost the thread on weddings.  They were traditionally a celebration (and a witness by members of their community of their covenant) with friends and family.  Now they are viewed as a performance where your guests are "extras" who must dress, behave and gift according to your instructions.  Excluding children is a choice, but not one that reflects well on the couple.  If kids are "inappropriate" in your formal venue, think about another setting.  If kids are "too expensive" to feed, then think about a different type of reception.  If you all plan to be too drunk to have kids in the same room, think about your self control and ideas of "fun".[/quote]

It doesn't matter who's 'driving' the plans. It is THEIR wedding and THEIR choice. Don't lay all this on one person.  If one of them wanted kids in attendance, there would be kids.

I have to wonder what kind of family/friends you have that dictate how their guests "dress, behave and gift". DH and I have large families of origin and go to a LOT of weddings. I've never seen anything other than the usual "black tie optional" kind of notation. No one has ever dictated dress, behavior or gifts.  Maybe you need a different circle.

You seem to think, in the past, weddings were all pretty much the same.  That's not true.  Check out what Sharon Kabel (link below) found in her research on the topic.  It's only since some people have become so kid-centric that there's been outrage/disparagement when their snowflakes aren't invited. There has never been one right way to have a wedding. If the choices a couple makes about their wedding don't work for you, politely decline.
 
https://sharonkabel.com/post/childfree-weddings/[/quote]

I was looking at a wedding website for a sports celebrity. They had a page with colors they want people to wear with color swatch examples. I guess they don't want people wearing fire engine red or canary yellow in the background of photos for instagram. It's also weird to make these websites public where random people like me can read them.[/quote]

I'm sure they've partnered with brands and are using their wedding to generate revenue and promote their "brand". Not typical for most Americans. [/quote]

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