Reply to Do you sometimes wish you were widowed

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes, especially on days that I am  so angry at him.. I often dream of myself living with just me and the kids.. I have come to resent him over the years for being so controlling which led to really falling out of love.. on the other hand, I don't want to divorce for the sake of my children as they don't really see us being unhappy and miserable.. but I am, have been for a good few years.. so yeah sometimes I daydream about it only because he is also very unhealthy.. his doctor even said he might not reach 50 if he does not change his ways (he is only 42 now)[/quote]

Are you sure your kids don’t pick up on the unhappiness in your marriage?
If your husband is unhealthy, watch out that he doesn’t have a debilitating stroke or heart attack which would result in you getting stuck taking care of him. Leave while you can. [/quote]

I have had to master the act of pretending.. sure there maybe days that my oldest will pick up a tension but it's not always the case.. I always try not to show when we fight or ague around our kids..  to be fair I am still working and hoping that things will fall back in to place once again for our marriage, but at the same time I can't help but wonder and daydream on not having to consult to anyone and being controlled as well.. I have never been to a mall by myself! always with him or with a child because he prefers it that way! so yes, I dream about being able to do mundane things just by myself and make all the decisions for me and my children.. and honestly, the children are closer to me than him and relies on me more.. he does not do sh*t at home at all.. and my kids can see that.. as for him being unhealthy, we've always talked about death between us.. it's not a sore subject for us.. we've told each other how we want it in the unfortunate event that we get really sick and in his case if he gets a heart attack or stroke.. he never wanted to live a vegetable so he always told me if I had a choice to pull the plug, then I must do it.. [/quote]

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