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[quote=Anonymous]I'm also a professor, and I've been teaching for 20 years. I'm tenured (in the humanities) at an R-1. 
I'm guessing that OP had a bad day or a series of incidents with bad students. I totally empathize. 
I will say that 98% of my students are good eggs. They are engaged, smart, do the work, etc. Most don't even come to my office hours or stop by to talk to me after class. A small fraction are notably ill-prepared for college, whether it be academically, socially, or psychologically. Those that really require help I do notify admin about through various means--an all reputable universities will have deans, support services, etc., in place for faculty to flag students who are in need of help.
We are most definitely, however, not trained counselors or even teachers. We receive minimal pedagogical training, and we are rewarded with tenure (at research universities) not for teaching, but for publishing. Our pay raises are for publishing and for winning grants, not for teaching. 
Parents who expect professors to intercede on behalf of their children who need to shower, do laundry, learn manners (via email or otherwise) do not understand the role of faculty in a college. University is not an extension of high school. We are not "partnering" with parents to raise your children. We are experts in our chosen fields, and we transmit knowledge to young adults. 
And while I sympathize with parents who have SN children, we are never to assume that a student of ours has SN and therefore treat your SN with courtesies that we would not provide to other students. If you child does have SN, then you as a parent must communicate with the college's disabilities office. That office will then send a letter to your student to send to professors about any academic accommodations. Academic accommodations, not social ones. [/quote]

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