Reply to AITA: Getting crap for not attending a Friday wedding because we have no childcare

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Dh's cousin is getting married at 3pm on a Friday two hours away from home so we'd have to leave by noon at the latest if we went. Our kids are 5 and 2. On Fridays, our older one gets out of school at 3pm and our little one only has a half day of daycare til 12:30 then comes home for nap. DH's whole family will be at the wedding obviously so they can't watch the kids, my mom still works full time, and our 3 regular sitters also work full time. We are going on a vacation two weeks before the wedding and don't really have extra PTO to burn either.

For some reason this has spiraled into a huge family issue. DH's brother called last night and said that he is planning on coming in to town for the wedding with his 3yo and 1yo because his wife has a marathon that weekend and asked if whoever is watching our kids can watch his too. We said we weren't planning on going because we don't have anyone to watch the kids. Then he suggests that we split an AirBnb near the wedding (in the middle of literal nowhere) and "find a local babysitter" to watch all 4 kids. Then was annoyed when we said we weren't leaving our kids in a strange house with a strange person. Finally, MIL calls and suggests that she, FIL, DH, and BIL just go to the wedding as a family and I take the day off work and have all 4 kids (1, 2, 3, and 5yo) by myself overnight.

I'm perfectly happy with DH going to the wedding alone and staying home with my kids, but I don't have a PTO day to take and just really don't want the 4 little kids alone for the night. AITA?[/quote]

NTA. Jesus, it's a wedding. Big deal. So you guys don't go. Or your DH goes. Send a gift and they can get over it. But, no, I would not be taking the day off to watch someone else's kids. I just wouldn't And would not be sorry about it either. If MIL/FIL/BIL want to pay someone so BIL's kids have a sitter, fine. But that's not going to be on me.

This is one reason why a no-kids wedding sucks. When I got these and had a small child, we just declined and moved on. I took some grief early on but basically told my family to stuff it. [/quote]

I’m going to guess that the big deal is that MIL wants to get both of her kids together and see her grandkids and kind of panicked.

This is a stupid plan, OP.  But I’m sure your husband and his brother can come up with something else more reasonable.  [/quote]

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