Reply to Friend group is blowing up due to rift between teen girls

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[quote=Anonymous]The moms are way too involved. I say this as a parent of one kid who could care less about being cool and another with SN who has had been on the receiving end of far worse. I teach my kids resilience skills and get them therapy when needed. I do not tell people's mommy's on them. If something really bad is happening at school and my kid has tried all the strategies and it continues, I might let them know MY kid is struggling with dynamics without blaming everyone else.

I never cared about being cool. I had a neighborhood friend by convenience in preschool early elementary. By the time I was approaching tweendom-when real connection mattered I drifted away. She had a very sweet exterior, but was pretty judgmental and mean girl behind closed doors. Her mom was livid I was drifting and got my mom involved who berated me and tried to insist we be friends again. For years the mom would glare at me in the neighborhood and my mom would tell me how embarrassed it made her that I was so awful. This girl could not function in the world beyond social engineering. She dropped out of grad school and has never had a job for very long and for decades her mom would still talk to my mom about how everything that went wrong with her daughter was someone else's fault-first me, then other girls, the roommates, then coworkers.[/quote]

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