Reply to Same college, same sorority, many of my prettiest sorority sisters did not marry well. Who did?

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Reply to "Same college, same sorority, many of my prettiest sorority sisters did not marry well. Who did? "

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Claiming it’s devious and shallow guys after family money is a coping strategy. Most prep school alumni are not trust fund stereotypes. It boils down to simply steeping for 15 years in a private school. Pre K-12 does exponentially more to mold your disposition and foundation than college ever will. No parent wants to admit that because nobody wants to confront the fact that their overachieving public school child could claw into an elite college and they will not be given a fresh clean slate once they get there. And as OP detailed, even average-looking underachieving prep school alumni can go slack off at a party college and rush the same sorority as your daughter, but they will clean up the cream of the crop bachelors. It ain’t family money, it’s the fact that we’re all pretty baked in the cake by age 18. There is nothing you can do to replicate or catch up to peers who spent 15 years in a private school ethos. And the boys (and girls) who desire that disposition quickly tease “it” out of whomever they’re talking to. As the kids say, it’s a whole vibe.[/quote]

Please tell us, what is this “ethos?” Is it looking down on people who are different or less wealthy than you?

We have a high net worth and annual income, and lead a wonderful lifestyle, but there is something so off-putting about all the area privates that we have so far refused to enroll our (early elementary) kids. Our own families are European (Christian)-American-Israeli(Jewish). There are many advanced degrees and a few successful entrepreneurs in the family. My kid’s best friend is a first generation Ethiopian boy whose dad is a truck driver and whose mom works retail. This kid’s “ethos,” to borrow your term, is to be a generous, thoughtful and kind friend; he’s also excelling at school and is the best athlete in three sports without ever boasting about it. When I compare that kid with the neighborhood private school kids, it’s clear to me which “ethos” we’d rather have around our children. The private school kids are entitled, loud, and while they know how to be polite, they do it as if to fulfill a checklist, and not out of genuine concern for others. 
We would like better teacher-student ratios and smaller schools, but not at the expense of our kids growing up to believe they are better than others simply because their family has more money. [/quote]

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