Reply to If you had an affair with a married person

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "If you had an affair with a married person "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had an ex husband who cheated on me. He was mentally unwell, bipolar and we did not have sex for 5 years. He was either depressed or manic, and it was not attractive at all, not to mention crazy.  I was trying my best to look after our baby/young daughter during those years. Same situation as the above poster.

After being separated for two years, i finally went online and met someone that pursued me. He was much younger, and I made fun of him for being a beefcake. His pic was of his six pack and it was so cheesy. I never wanted to meet up with him.

We became fast friends, and had so much in common. I trusted him enough to treat me well after not being sexual in a long time. Our one night stand lasted five years. He was married even though I met him online, thinking he was single. I don’t regret it. He is a kindred soul.[/quote]

Gahh the rationalizing… kindred souls???  Girl.  You learned all the wrong lessons from your bad experience.  How sad.[/quote]

Says someone who has never been in the same situation. He was kind, caring, and he brought my mojo back. He wanted intimacy and affection, which was missing in his marriage. And he was so f@cling hot. The last thing I wanted was a relationship.

For you married folks, there are a lot of married people online. And FYI, I never put in my profile: looking for a married person. [/quote]

DP. If you were kindred souls and he cared about you so much, why did he not divorce to be with you? Asking seriously. You invested five years in each other. Why did it not end up with you together, if you truly were kindred, and you gave him "intimacy and affection" he never got at home? He was staying for the kids or finances? Why did you eventually break up if, again, you had five years invested and you were supposed soulmates? [/quote]

This was what ultimately brought my long term affair to a closeZ after a decade of being appealing and understanding we spoke after a long hiatus and he said how much he loved me; I said, “if you loved me you would be here now.” Kicking off a very frank conversation in which he said that if we he had wasn’t love then he had never loved anyone.[/quote]

Omg. Were you played. “What is love? Please don’t hurt me no more”.  The same tried and true BS from the player’s hand book.  He didn’t leave.  He had zero intention of leaving and he lived in a fake fantasy world of escapism where he played you like a fiddle to get the external validation his narc self needed.[/quote]

He never had any intention of leaving and did not pretend otherwise. He just convinced me that life is imperfect and settling for scraps is sometimes the best we can do. While he had, and has, much more.[/quote]

Wake the hell up and re-read your own post.  You settled for scraps and he’s telling you that’s the best you can do.

He was having his cake and eating it too and getting off playing you and having you express your love for him.

Good lord. Go to therapy.[/quote]

You are very aggressive. And you have poor reading comprehension. As already written, I woke up and it is over. [/quote]

"He just convinced me that life is imperfect and settling for scraps is sometimes the best we can do. While he had, and has, much more."

This is very troubling".  If you can't see how you were being used and he thought you just deserved scraps while he had his cake and ate it too, you really need therapy for your self-esteem. This guy was playing you.  I hope you realize this now--and are no longer 'convinced' that is life.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics