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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]In reference to the other thread where it was concluded that the good guys with the potential to make good money are always paired up very early in life- in college or before. This makes me feel major FOMO because in high school and college, I had 0 idea what a “marriage material” guy was and how to identify them. But I had a roomate, I recall, who had been dating her engineer bf since hs. They were monogamous throughout college and he went to an Ivy League across the country. They already had it all mapped out. What jobs they were going to do; how many kids they would have.

How did she know so early what’s a good guy? And how to keep him?

I was so clueless and only now in my thirties am remembering the things she said about marriage and husbands.

Who teaches these girls? How they know? What do they know? [/quote]

Nobody teaches anything. They just got lucky.[/quote]
Not just lucky. People got what they wanted. Some girls wanted the loud aggressive hunks, others wanted the quiet considerate nerds. They thought the hunk was more fun I guess. You got what you wanted and they got what they wanted.[/quote]

Things don't always work out as you want. Nerds doesn't always end up financially successful. Hunks can become successful because smooth talking tall white handsome men are always at advantage in professional lives, even if sports doesn't work out.[/quote]

+1 There are some nerds here who really want their vengeance against popular kids, but that doesn't make it so. Social skills are generally very important to career growth, and good looks help with everything. The best partners (men and women) are the athletes with good grades, ambition, and good social skills.[/quote]
this is a dumb post.

DH is not athletic, doesn't have huge ambitions, sometimes socially awkward,  but he's a great partner.  Doesn't whine and complain about doing house chores or childcare.  He does most of the grocery shopping, and cooking because I hate to cook.

The jocks and those with huge ambitions tend to be jerks and selfish because their high ambitions overshadow their partners wants and needs.[/quote]

Any population (this can be jocks or nerds, for that matter) can be selfish A-holes.  The ones who have been told how great they are are usually the most selfish, and make the worst partners.

OTOH, worst partners can also be those with something to prove, and they can be very jealous, sour and man behind closed doors - yet present their "best humble selves" to the outside.

OP, truth is, you have no way of knowing who is a good partner.  The one and only rule is that you have to start with a good human, whose ideas match yours in many (not all - but the most important) way.  The rest comes later.

Many women feel like they just aren't "lucky" - but what is lacking is a genuine good attitude - you can't fake that - and if you think you can - you can't fake it for long.

Stop thinking anyone has a crystal ball - because they don't.

Even if you "marry rich" - that person usually has an ex-wife or two to pay, and kids to put through college, and help out - which is not cheap.  If you marry divorced, don't think you will come first, because you won't.

Most people who "marry rich" when they are younger, did not marry rich at all, but built whatever they have together - which really counts for so much, and can't be replicated. [/quote]

*mean behind closed doors[/quote]

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