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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Wife Wants To Be A SAHM "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]WOHM carry a lot of guilt about leaving their children in daycare AND the housework that they cannot ever get ahead of. Even outsourcing a lot of work does not take away that guilt. They are ok with their choice to work as long as they get confirmation that they made a smart choice. Usually, seeing SAHMs and their children become poor due to divorce, husband's death, addiction, or low earning spouse etc is a confirmation that being financially self sufficient is a good choice of a concerned mother. Also, being a WOHM and having a dual earning household results in a better house, finances to educated the kids in college, ability to help family members etc. So most have a great sense of satisfaction when they compare themselves to a SAHM with poor education, no ability to outsource and being dependent on the mercy of a low educated man. However, in this area where all the East Coast Liberal Elites congregate, the SAHMs do not fit that narrative. Most are well off, have lots of financial security, outsource stuff all the time, have lots of support, can afford the world, have supportive husbands, have good marriages, can give all advantages to their kids and they have an easier time running their household. They are also not isolated. That is the reason that you will see a lot of attacks on rich, educated SAHMs on this board. This is stemming from jealousy. An uneducated and poor SAHM is an object of pity and no one should be sparing her even one thought. [/quote] :roll: As a former SAHM, I think this is a bunch of whiny nonsense. [/quote] High status SAHM > WOHM > Low status SAHM[/quote] Oh please. Stop whining. It’s embarrassing. - former SAHM. [/quote] Being in a circle of high earning men and women, let me fix this for you: High status WOHM >> High status SAHM >> Low status WOHM >> low status SAHM [/quote] When Dh and I got married, we witnessed many power couples. We witnessed many kids with problems when both parents were in high positions. I know that just because two parents have high powered jobs doesn’t equate to having messed up kids but that was a gamble we did not want to take. We lived in NYC where kids would boss around their nannies and drivers. The entitlement was out of control. Some kids got shipped off to boarding school. Many people had multiple nannies, like 3-4 because they needed around the clock care including weekends. If one parent has a flexible decent job who can still focus on the kids, that is most ideal. I stopped working when I had my third kid and it did throw me off balance. Juggling two kids was hard enough. [/quote] I actually think the ideal situation is two parents with flexible well-paid jobs that they enjoy, but that is obviously a privileged situation to be in. [/quote] Everyone’s definition of success is different. We have a seven figure income. Dh and I were both earning high six figures when I stopped working. Now he earns a seven figure income by himself while I stay home. I am pretty sure Dh would have a hard time having a job that is high reward high pay to go to a flexible work from home type job that pays a fraction of what he is currently earning.[/quote]
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