Reply to What do you do when your adult child goes into therapy and lays blame at your feet.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So DS 30's has finally gone into therapy to work on himself, but now he is basically blaming me and my marriage problem/fighting, my religion that I forced on him, my homeschooling, my house rules, etc. All these things caused his mental problems and unhappiness according to his therapist. I have apologized if I contributed but there is not much to be done now. He wrote me a letter about it. It's depressing have all this blame hurled at me, I can't change the past and I wasn't a perfect parent - but we did our best and I thought he had a fairly happy childhood, much better than DH and I. I tried to give him the childhood I wanted as a kid. It's causing me to feel down. No one can hurt you like your kid.[/quote]

I suspect that therapists cause more problems than they solve.

[/quote]

Typical response given by someone who is not capable of admitting their own fault or failures.[/quote]

Oh come on. There are bad therapists just like there are bad mechanics, bad plumbers, bad dentists, etc. I can't count how many times I've been ripped off by mechanics. People seeking therapy are mentally and psychologically vulnerable. That plus the crap shoot of whether or not they get a good or bad therapist -- that doesn't sound good.[/quote]

But do you think mechanics cause more problems than they solve?[/quote]

Yes. Go in for one thing, come out paying for three things. Same with plumbers in case you didn't realize that.[/quote]

PP again -- especially considering the wide variety of opinions people hold and the way they approach life, it's highly likely to get a therapist who is a kook or went into therapy for the wrong reasons or is just not that bright despite making it through school. Etc. Yes, very likely, also considering most people randomly choose someone from a list provided by their insurance. It's a total crap shoot.[/quote]

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