Reply to Why do husbands never leave for the affair partner?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Inertia, OP.

It’s usually costly to upend your life, unless your new love interest is well-off.

There is social opprobrium to deal with.

There is emotional upset in spouses, children, friends and relatives to manage.

And that’s if you believe your love interest is marriage material!

Too much hassle.

[/quote]

No. Not inertia.

Many men love their wives and family.   Period.  The other pp quoted 64% are very happy in their marriages.

They compartmentalize.  The side piece is not considered to be 'real'.  It's a distraction for awhile.

And so much of the time, it's a life stage.  It coincides with inner turmoil midlife and no more.  Serial cheaters or cheaters in an unhappy marriage are a different story.[/quote]

Many men I counsel state that discovery of an affair was a giant relief.  The lies and double life take a real toll.  Many get in to deep and when they come clean and find out “why” they are so much better off.  They describe that time as a weird unreal time.  They are deeply ashamed.

You do get the ones that don’t care, but the marriage was over long ago.  As a counselor, I see many more of good men in a bad emotional point- usually midlife that truly love their wives and want help.[/quote]

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