Reply to Husband leaves room to talk to MIL

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Husband leaves room to talk to MIL"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What happens when you call her and invite her to lunch? [/quote]

Since she works odd hours it's usually on the weekends and I'll call/text her a couple days before for like a Saturday and say DH and I would like to get lunch with you and she will either ignore it or just call DH later to finalize plans but I imagine it would kill her to actually text me herself. I invited her out to lunch when DH was away one weekend for work and she just said she is going out with her daughter didn't even think to invite me. Not saying she has to everytime she goes out with her daughter obviously but since i reached out it would have been nice knowing I was sitting home alone.[/quote]

Why on EARTH would you expect to be invited out to lunch with your MIL and SIL really ever?!?  Why didn’t you plan something with your friends when your DH was out of town?  Is it because you have no friends?[/quote]

I have friends but they were busy that weekend but knowing I was by myself why wouldn't mil want to include me with the girls? Why is it such a foreign concept to hang out with a mil and SIL? I know plenty of women who get invited to girls day with their MIL and SILs.[/quote]

ALL of your friends were busy that weekend?  Why did you sit at home alone?  You can’t go do something yourself?

Have you ever invited your MIL and SIL to a girls day?  Why is the onus on them?

And most importantly, do you think you have no role to play in this dynamic?  You seem to play the victim a lot. [/quote]

My husband left Friday night. Saturday my friends all had plans. Sunday afternoon I went to brunch with some of my girls. I have invited my SIL and MIL to brunch or girls days before and they either say no or they go a couple weeks later and never invite me. I don't expect to be invited obviously every time they go out as mother and daughter but it would be nice to be invited sometime as a DIL/SIL. I just feel like when I'm never invited it's like they don't see me as a member of the family AT ALL and its hurtful.

I'm not saying I never play a role but c'mon you can't seriously claim this is normal behavior to act towards someone married into the family to insist to your son he can't bring his wife to a family dinner 2x a month. You guys talk about me putting him in between him and his mom well by his mom telling my husband not to invite me she is putting herself in between her son and his wife. Your parents and siblings become your extended family and your spouse and any children you have are now your main family.

To me once you're married you stick by your spouse and they come first they are your main family now. I would never dream (hypothetically speaking) if I had a grown son to put him in a position of choosing between me and his wife and I would never dream of telling him he can't bring her and i wohld expect him to choose his wife every time. Once married they are your main family along with any children you choose to have.

Again what if we had kids would he be expected to go to these family dinners and not bring me? Therefore expecting me to tend to the guys by myself almost every Friday while my husband gets to sit back and enjoy wine and dinner with his family of origin? How is that fair to me? I dunno I just feel like the minute his mother told him not to bring me he should have stood up for me and said mom I'm sorry I can't exclude my wife shr is my main family and therefore can't be left out of a family dinner. I love you and want to spend time with you but not at the exclusion of my wife just about every Friday. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics