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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]There's judgment both ways. Let's not pretend otherwise. As a WOHM, I have listened to sooooo many comments from non-WOHMs that are tiny little digs. How HARD it must be not to be able to raise my own children. How much my daughter must MISS me. How they could NEVER leave their kids ALONE WITH STRANGERS like that. Etc., etc.

It gets old, so the implication that one can be anything other than a full time mom does indeed grate on my nerves. I've never been a part-time mom. Did I have others helping care for my children between the ages of 1 and 5 yrs? Yep. I also contribute to my family's security by working. No "mom credit" for that though because it's viewed as a selfish choice.[/quote]
Is financial security the only kind that matters?
What about emotional security?
How about the fact that little children require care that is 1) Stable 2) Competent 3) Loving. Few lucky parents can find that, even those who can well afford to buy it.[/quote]

I didn't say that financial security is the only thing that matters. But I challenge you to tell me how you can provide stability (your #1 below) with no financial security. Food, clothing and housing are pretty important.

We were fortunate enough that we were able to find stable, competent and loving caregivers for our children. And, I think there are far more parents that find that than you might want to believe. Reading between the lines, it would seem you think the majority of non-parental childcare out there is this world is unstable and caregivers are incompetent and unloving (thus justifying the story that you tell yourself that only a PARENT at home can provide stable, competent, loving care).

Our kids all know exactly who mom & dad are and that mom & dad are always going to be around. Our kids also know that nanny Kayla adored them and came to visit for years, and that au pair Angela has returned from her home country twice to visit us because she loves them dearly. They also DON'T know what it's like to be hungry, cold, or uncertain where they'll sleep the next week, which can be a genuine reality when a single-earner family suffers a job loss. I grew up with a single parent (she worked, in order to feed us) and there was always a level of fear and uncertainty about what would happen if anything became of her job. Based on my own upbringing, knowing what an absolutely remarkable, committed, and amazing WORKING mother I had, and understanding financial insecurity from a young age, I've decided that one of the many ways I can be the best mother to my children is to provide them with financial security IN ADDITION TO my unconditional love and support.[/quote]

Agree with first PP and above PP.

Any of SAHMs trying to foist the blame all on the working moms are out of line. There are jerks on both sides.  There are nice live-and-let-live people on both sides.  There are insecurities on both sides or these damn threads wouldn't fill up with responses time after time after time.[/quote]

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