Reply to Wife had Affair with Coworker

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]have been in a similar situation, on the other side. I was a cheater dw until recently with a divorced co-worker for a year. I ended it. The guilt, fear of being caught by dh/other employees, tiredness of trying to arrange trips, work excuses, realizing that I was more emotionally invested in this than him and the relationship just getting monotonous made me stop it. Midway, I offered him that I would get divorced if he was willing to partner with me. He was quiet. And I realized that this was not worth pursuing really with all the risks. He was an incredible sex partner, we connected really well on so many levels. My marriage has been on the floor since last 2 years, small kids, stressful jobs. This was my little secret fun that allowed me to survive. Now, I am back to my marriage, ready to rebuild it again. Since I have been in this mindset I have also seen a positive change coming from dh. But I wish that the world was not so black and white. I wish the marriage contracts were flexible to accommodate the changes we go through as people time to time.[/quote]

Shocking that while you were having an affair your marriage was on the floor, and that once you ended the affair and actually started putting that emotional energy into your marriage, you have seen positive changes.  Your post is all about you and your “secret fun,”  full of rationalizations. Your affair was not unique.  Read in any of the infidelity forums.  You sound exactly like every other cheater.[/quote]

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