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Reply to "Mil wants to be called Mama X "
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why not just call her Big Mama instead[/quote] Or Old Mama. Or Big Old Mama. [/quote] And then she can call OP, Whiney Insecure Brat. Where does it stop??? This is not a big deal. Let it go. Jeez. There are worse things that could happen then a MIL who has expressed a preference for [b]a name that is pretty commonplace outside of the small, entitled world of DCUM. [/b] If this is getting OP's fire going now, just wait until she gets into Labor & Delivery and experiences there the host of indignities childbirth brings on. The bottom line is that it is more important for the child to have a lot of warm, loving people around him/her. Sounds like the MIL wants to be involved. Let her be called what she wants. Chances are the kid will call her something different anyway. Just ask my Dad who was dying to be called "Granddad" and he is called "Pop". My mom won't let that one down. She calls him "Soda", which confused the heck out of the kids for the longest time. Just a little mid-west humor, folks! Get over your fine self, OP, and build a thicker skin. Your kid is counting on you to be more concerned about his/her best interests than yours.[/quote] No, it's really not commonplace at all. It may be in your culture, but I've never heard of it where I'm from, and I'm not from the "small, entitled world of DCUM." Also I note that you steadfastly refuse to address any of the other boundary-crossing done by the MIL, nor the fact that it's perfectly OK to say to someone, "You know, I really don't like that name. Could you please pick another?" In NORMAL HEALTHY relationships, that's ok. The fact that you think she's going to somehow destroy the relationship by not wanting another woman to be called "mama" says more about your passivity and lack of agency than it does about love and family. [/quote] Nope. I just don't have to have all things my way all the time. I have enough self esteem that I don't worry about someone else getting what they want regardless of my opinion of it. Notice that I have not once said WHAT on earth I think about the name. But I'm steadfast in saying it just isn't worth the fight because I get my self worth from me and not from the power that I try to wield over other people. The kid will know the difference between the two people just as someone else pointed out that the child of a lesbian couple knows the difference between Mommy and Momma. Oh, and, Ms. Reading Comprehension, obviously I'm from the mid-west.[/quote] I'm the poster who made the point about the lesbian and bisexual couples in my circle usually ending up with Mommy and Mama. I agree with you that the baby knows the difference between the two individuals who are Mommy and Mama. BUT that is different from the point you are trying to make with my example. Mommy and Mama are the same "level" of parent with the same relationship to the child: mother. Mama and "Big Mama" are NOT the same relationship, and are not the same "level" of person to the child. I think what upsets the OP is that she thinks her MIL is trying to make it seem like the relationship/level of Mama and Grandma are the same by using "Mama" instead of "Grandma" or any of the standard grandmother names. --Also a Midwesterne[/quote] And we are saying that personal preference aside Mama Grace is a standard Gramma name even if it is new to you. You may not like it, may not want it used, but it is not something new she pulled out of her ass.[/quote] I'm the poster your directly referring to. This isn't the 1950s, nor is it Possum Junction, nor is it a Tennessee Williams play. "Mama Grace" is not a standard grandma name. It's not that it's "new" or not new to me or to anyone else. It's that it really is such an outlier that very few people here would find "Mama Anything" to be acceptable. [/quote]
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