Reply to what's the worst affair story you've heard of where the marriage recovered?

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Reply to "what's the worst affair story you've heard of where the marriage recovered?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She can't.  I believe some variant of this happened to her and her My Marriage Trumps All thing spills out from that.  But I would bet hers is a deeply unhappy marriage.[/quote]
Please explain why consideration for the child of the affair should trump consideration for the children of marriage+wife.  It would help if you didn't get personal and relied on logic. [/quote]

Why is it better for the wife and children of the marriage - whose happiness you evidently consider to be all important - to be tied to a man willing to put their emotional wellbeing at risk by CHEATING IN THE FIRST PLACE? Denying the existence of the child of the affair does not mean that the affair didn't happen. Maintaining secrets is a cornerstone of dysfunctional families. No one wins in your "ideal" scenario. [/quote]
There are no ideal scenarios in this situation.  Everyone loses in every single one of them.

No one has to be tied to anyone.  The wife in this situation has every right to divorce.  Many do.  For those who decide, together, not to, it's not a bad idea to know about what happened to others who have been there before.  Certainly for a man who decided to ask for and earn the forgiveness of his wife, making her wellbeing a priority is a good idea.

No one is denying the existence of a child.  Just like there are estranged families, no one denies they exist, people just decide to create distance because that's what is best for them. There are no secrets between spouses in this scenario. Both know what happened.  As for children, we all keep age-inappropriate things from them. [/quote]

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